This Would Be Anger Talking...
Why? Why do I care enough? Why don't I just hand out ALL "A's"... if I do that... then no one has to be accountable and then parents won't be upset. I get to go home everyday at 3:15 and not grade. I can smile and not stress about holding students accountable. I won't have to sit at night and grade and write comments on papers. WHY don't I just make it easy on myself?
Needless to say I had an angry parent today. Not your run of the mill angry parent. A parent with anger management/bipolar issues that I don't want to get into (email me if you want details) and I can honestly say, I feared for my well being. I had to END the conference sternly and call the principal, all the while shaking. I didn't want him to see my fear when he scared me. I tried to remember my street smarts from Chester. Whatever I did, it worked after awhile and I didn't have to call the police. I've honestly never been more scared in my life. I felt like I had no control. My mind was divided... on the street I would have yelled and screamed and ran for help or fought back and screamed. But here at school, I had to TRY to remain professional. I had to TRY to handle it all with dignity. I had to TRY and calm this parent down because I was all alone with him. (He dismissed his child from the room - that was when I realized I was in trouble.) I wanted to tell him to get the hell out of my room before I called the police but I had this inner professional voice telling me to just say the conference was now over. I managed to walk to the phone to get the principal and I opened my pod door at the same time, praying someone was in the middle room or their rooms. No such luck and I got my principal's voice mail. I thought about pretending I was talking to her but instead just said I needed her to come to the room immediately and that I would try her again in 5 minutes as I KNEW she would be BACK IN HER OFFICE. The dad seemed to get the idea. Eventually, he left. I felt the rush in my legs and whole body really.
The sad part is - his son was right outside the door and heard the whole thing. Another student of mine - a girl - ran to her mother's room (a fellow teacher) and begged her to call someone but her mom thought she was exaggerating. She believes her now. (I went to talk to her since I was doing a home visit and she could see I was visible shaken up.)
I feel better now. But will I continue to care? Will I continue to TEACH? I've got a lot of thinking to do.
Needless to say I had an angry parent today. Not your run of the mill angry parent. A parent with anger management/bipolar issues that I don't want to get into (email me if you want details) and I can honestly say, I feared for my well being. I had to END the conference sternly and call the principal, all the while shaking. I didn't want him to see my fear when he scared me. I tried to remember my street smarts from Chester. Whatever I did, it worked after awhile and I didn't have to call the police. I've honestly never been more scared in my life. I felt like I had no control. My mind was divided... on the street I would have yelled and screamed and ran for help or fought back and screamed. But here at school, I had to TRY to remain professional. I had to TRY to handle it all with dignity. I had to TRY and calm this parent down because I was all alone with him. (He dismissed his child from the room - that was when I realized I was in trouble.) I wanted to tell him to get the hell out of my room before I called the police but I had this inner professional voice telling me to just say the conference was now over. I managed to walk to the phone to get the principal and I opened my pod door at the same time, praying someone was in the middle room or their rooms. No such luck and I got my principal's voice mail. I thought about pretending I was talking to her but instead just said I needed her to come to the room immediately and that I would try her again in 5 minutes as I KNEW she would be BACK IN HER OFFICE. The dad seemed to get the idea. Eventually, he left. I felt the rush in my legs and whole body really.
The sad part is - his son was right outside the door and heard the whole thing. Another student of mine - a girl - ran to her mother's room (a fellow teacher) and begged her to call someone but her mom thought she was exaggerating. She believes her now. (I went to talk to her since I was doing a home visit and she could see I was visible shaken up.)
I feel better now. But will I continue to care? Will I continue to TEACH? I've got a lot of thinking to do.
posted by Indigo Robe | 4:11 PM
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